identity

Ever imagined why, we never felt secure in our own skin, fearing our own shadow, as it grows on us, as we move away from the bright light?

As we try to carve more and more of ourself, and form our own name, we tend to fail, fall back to insecurity.

Ever thought why? Why we get so defensive over certain things, or hold on to certain things to tightly? Or sometimes how we are so influenced by peers?

We can't name ourselves, or more specifically, we can't give ourselves a name. (I'm not talking about names like John, Joanne etc, I'm talking about identity, title). Only God knows our capabilities, our limits, our strengths, and more importantly, He accepts us for who we are.

Reading 'The Namer' by Matt Rawlins was really good. Suddenly I understood so many other things. Like a bulb lit over my head, I saw a revelation in who I am, and what I need not strive to be. All the talk about, I am secure in Christ, and I am made whole in Him, finally made sense.

You see, when we try to name ourselves, we try to place ourselves in a position that we think we should be, we often fail. The book gave an example of Saul, who was insecure about his position, coming from the smallest family in the smallest tribe of his country, he was picked as king. He couldn't see or understand why, and hence, using human reason, he strived to be king. He did what ever that was humanly possible to maintain his status. A lot of times, he did what others told him to do (for fear that they may see less of him, sounding familiar?) or protect his title as king. So as David (who was confident of who he was in God) came along, Saul was jealous. He was afraid that this man would be a title snatcher. King Saul tried to kill David a couple of times, but was unable to.

This is just one example of how, when one tries to carve their own name, and because of not knowing what exactly is his/her name, it fails.

Psalm 139:

1-6 God, investigate my life; get all the facts firsthand.
I'm an open book to you;
even from a distance, you know what I'm thinking.
You know when I leave and when I get back;
I'm never out of your sight.
You know everything I'm going to say
before I start the first sentence.
I look behind me and you're there,
then up ahead and you're there, too—
your reassuring presence, coming and going.
This is too much, too wonderful—
I can't take it all in!

That's how well God knows me, and how well He knows my name. I am thus secured in Him.